Courage is so hard to muster
Every single day
Because intimidating forces
Might get in my way
But I don't need a friend
I don't need no street gang
I don't need backup
I need the one who don't back down
In the face of danger

I need a hero
Like myself when I'm drunk
He's the legend that he strives to be
Taking down insecurity

He's typically keeps to himself
But when whiskey's in his veins
He'll take on any larger foes
And punch apart a subway train
He's got all it takes
To overcome life's fears
Like arguing with cabbies
Or walking through the park at night
All he needs is seven beers

I need a hero
Like myself when I'm drunk
After a few tonics and gin
Nothing strikes fear into him

And I need him more than ever now
Cuz I'm going to a party where
I don't know anyone downtown

Many try to thwart his heroics
But it won't ever work
Cuz he's a guy who stands his ground
Like when a stupid clerk
Asked him to lower his voice
In a 24-hour Walgreens
He just smiled and said
Hold on buddy can't you see
You're not dealing with weak and sober me

I need a hero
Like myself when I'm drunk
He'll fight a cop and when he's done
He can socialize with anyone
There ain't no hero
Like myself when I'm drunk
He's got the heart of 19 lions
And will gladly pay the littering fines

I need a hero (like myself when I'm)
I need a hero (like myself when I'm)
There ain't no hero (like myself when I'm)
Find me a hero